Farewell Fallujah

Remember a decade ago, at the start of the longest wag war in our history, when our wise leaders told us it would take only a few  months  and cost hardly nuthin? They’d lay a little “Shock and Awe” on those rascals in Iraq and they’d soon be out in the streets showering our troops with flowers, kisses, and thanks.

Do you remember the city of Fallujah? Of course not. That’s a stupid name for a city, right? It was one of the first big cities to greet our troops with ungrateful bullets and hidden road-side bombs. To teach them a lesson we kicked the snot out of the residents and destroyed most of their buildings. Then we packed up and left. Oops. When those folks started acting like Iraqis who wanted us to get the hell out of their country we had to go back and kick more snot and destroy more buildings. But we used some very special boomers during that second rescue. There was some gunk in those blasts that contained some unusual stuff that had unusual results, other than snot loss.

And now we learn what those shells and bombs did. We learn that 24% of newborn babies died before they were a week old, and 75% were born with deformities.  When babies were born with no skulls, or with stumps instead of arms and legs, we suggested that the women of Fallujah should stop having babies for a while. I’d be willing to bet that we handed out soccer balls and candy to the children of Fallujah to show how much we loved them.

In  a few days you’ll start to see the wonderful news that we are leaving Iraq! The war is over and we’re bringing the troops home! Good on us. Ain’t we wonderful.

It’s all bullshit.

We are leaving 16,000 American soldiers behind to help the new Iraq army to take over. We’ll just be out there out of town wee bit, on those  dozens of big bases we built, waiting, in case they do something we don’t approve of. We’ll also have a few thousand GIs resting across the border in Kuwait–just in case our handpicked government allows things to get out of  hand when we “leave.”

Just as our governmen lied to us and got us  into Vietnam, Bush,  Cheney and Rumsfeld lied to us to get us to attack a country that was no threat to us, I fear my man Obama has fallen under the same fever. If I lived in Iran I’d move, because we’re hearing noises about rescuing those folks too –and we have just  sent Marines to Australia as a warning to China.

Oh well, while we’re busy fighting those new wars maybe the folks in Fallujah can grow some new snot–and new babies.

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Fight Forth