I start each morning with a cup of coffee and the Bozeman Chronicle.  I usually growl over the news and opinion pages (It’s a voice for every right-wing nut in the area)  but I usually get my morning giggle when I read the Police Report, telling of what went on that night. Such as:

“A caller witnessed several people crawling out of the ditch across from the Animal Shelter. They were carrying sleeping bags.”

“A ‘very strange’ looking man was walking up and down Story Street all day.” Read More→

I understand that there are more than 250 different denominations in America, and when I ride around my little hometown I think we have most of them. There seems to be a church of one kind or another on every damn block. But we don’t have even one single synagogue. That’s too bad. We need Jews. They’re a special gang of people that I am very fond of. I’m speaking of American Jews. There’s another kind of Jew that is starting to piss me off — the Israeli Jews.

You may have heard the rumor that Hollywood and New York contain many Jews — and that’s true. The men who created and built Hollywood were Jews — Sam Goldwyn, Louis B. Mayer, Harry Cohn , the Zanucks, the Sarnoffs and the vast majority of the men who gave us movies and television, theatre and music were Jewish. And one helluva bunch of the actors and actresses who have captured our hearts are Jews. Just try to imagine American  life without the influence of such Jews as Mel Brooks, Mike Landon, Woody Allen, Kirk and Michael Douglas, Arthur Miller, Neil Simon, Dustin Hoffman, Billy Crystal, Larry David, Neil Diamond, Richard Dreyfus, Harrison Ford, Goldie Hawn, Carl and Rob Reiner, Barbra Stresiand, Jerry Seinfeld and Katie Couric. Hell, even the Fonz, Henry Winkler, is Jewish. The Starship Enterprise would never have gone where no men had gone before without Capt. Kirk and Mr. Spock, as portrayed by two Jewish actors, Bill Shatner and Leonard Nimoy. The wonderful gang on “Friends” wouldn’t have been the same without Ross and Phoebe, portrayed by two Jews, David Schwimmer and Lisa Kudrow. America fell in  love with Laura Ingalls Wilder on “Little House on the Prairie,” as portrayed by Jewish actress Melissa Gilbert. The great MASH  television series owed it’s life to Jewish writer/producer Larry Gelbart. Matthew Broderick is Jewish, and he’s married to the “Sex and the City” star Sarah Jessica Parker — a Jew. Remember the Three Stooges? All three, Larry, Curly and Moe, were Jewish. Read More→

The Christians are bugging me again.

Author Anne Rice, gets a salute from me by withdrawing from the Catholic Church again.  She has announced that she just can’t put up with all the crap anymore. “I remain committed the Christ — but find it impossible to belong to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious group. I refuse to be anti-gay. I refuse to be anti feminist. I refuse to be anti-birth control. I refuse to be anti-Democratic. I refuse to be anti-secular humanism.  I refuse to anti-science. I refuse to be anti-life. I refuse to be a Christian anymore.”

Good on you Anne. With that attitude you’ll be healed in no time. Read More→